Rowing, Box Jump and Other Random Treats

So a little story rolled into a life lesson coming at you here today.  As you may recall, my November challenge was the 1000 meter row challenge.  Essentially, by the end of November I had to row 1000 meters in four minutes or less.  While this may sound like a fairly easy accomplishment, let me tell you...It. Is. Not. The last 500 meters are BRUTAL.  Two days before the end of the month, I mosied into CFGR early to get a row workout in before the WOD.  After three 750 meter rows, I was feeling good, strong, tough (and maybe slightly cocky) and I decided to give my challenge a go.  So I rowed my ass off for the most hellacious four minutes ever.  I had my eyes closed through most of it, just counting my reps and trying not to die.  When I finally opened my eyes, I watched the computer roll over to the 1000 meter mark at exactly 4:00 minutes.  Exactly 4:00 minutes.  I was never so happy because I never wanted to do that again.  I celebrated by spending about 5 solid minutes after that face down on the concrete floor trying to come back to life. 

After a bit of rest, I went into the WOD feeling good...real good.  Strong, tough (and maybe slightly cocky from the endorphin rush left from my row).  I was 2 for 2 on my monthly challenges and, though tired, I was ready to take on the workout.  It was just the WOD...no big.  And then the clock started.

My hands, already slightly ripped up from the row, took a beating on the cargo net.  My forearms, already cashed before I started, were beaten to hell with farmers walk and net climbs.  I was tired. I was grumpy. I was in pain.  At 8 rounds PLUS burpees and wall balls on the board, I had a moment where I almost cried.  About round 6 I nearly threw in the towel.  I went from feeling good to feeling shitty.  Feeling strong to feeling weak. Definitely no longer cocky.  I went from high to low in a matter of twenty minutes.  Accomplished to defeated in one fell swoop.   Hands = demolished.  Arm = in pain. Ego = blown.  I walked out of the box looking like this:

And like this...

The lesson?  I came back. And I'll keep coming back.  Because with a few days with tape those rips on my hands healed and after about a week my bruise nearly disappeared.  It wasn't the first and I'm sure it won't be the last time I walk out of that place feeling worse than when I walked in, leaving my DNA behind in the form of blood, sweat and, in this case, maybe a few tears.  Nevertheless, the old saying is true - the pain is always temporary...pride lasts forever.  And after I had a few hours to collect myself, I remember that I did accomplish something that day and that I had every right to be proud.  

Never give up on yourself.  Bad days will always creep up on us, but the real test is how we handle them.  Always believe in your coach, your team and yourself.   You are capable of anything.

This month is "Destroy Your Weakness December" at CrossFit Grand Rapids.  Everyone is picking a skill that they have trouble with and are working throughout the month to, well, destroy it.  This fits seamlessly into my December challenge which is......dum da dum dum.....BOX JUMPS.

                                                Why hello biggest irrational fear known to CrossFit

Anyway, my hope is that I'll finish out the year strong with a perfect 3 for 3 and have the entirety of 2013 (and my life) to get better and better and better.  So I ask you this...what will you be focusing on during "Destroy Your Weakness December"?  I'm learning that most "weaknesses" stem from our mind and not actually our bodies.  Once we get our minds in the right place, we are capable of pretty much anything.  So get out there and destroy your weakness.  As Sam likes to say...CAN'T WAIT!

                                             

Respect Your Body

This is a difficult but necessary post to write. I'm struggling with how to make my point without giving too much away about something that I do not have the right to give away.  Geez, this is already confusing.

Ok.  Deep breath.  Two days ago, we received some news about my best friend that's a little scary.  Though I truly believe it will be ok and that her entire support system will be with her every step of the way, it is the kind of news that can stop you in your tracks.  It makes no sense and it's not fair and there's no rhyme or reason for it.  Look, I'm no stranger to these WTF moments in life.  Believe me - I've dealt with them more times than I would wish on anyone but it never makes it any easier.

What is truly dumbfounding to me is that the situation with my friend is totally random.  Randomness like that chills me to my bones.  I might be a leeeeeetle bit of a control freak.  It's hard for me to open up, break down walls, trust others and let them in.  I don't share much about my personal life/thoughts/feelings to...well, anyone.  That's one reason I started this blog - an experiment for me to see if I can actually get better at that.  So when something is completely and utterly life changing, yet out of my control, I have a very hard time dealing with it.  I spend nights awake thinking about it.  I spend hours during the day trying to find an answer, a reason, a tangible "this is why" that I can hold onto, even when I know it doesn't exist.

One thing this situation has reinforced for me is how much we need to respect our bodies, our lives.  We only get one...one short little life to live.  One body in which to live it in.  Learn about it, understand it, take care of it.  Push it to it's limits and then nourish it in it's recovery.  Fuel it with as much purity as possible and then treat it with the occasional rich indulgence that makes it buzz.  Explore and play and laugh and get dirty and make your mark on the earth every chance you have.  Stomp through the world and let your presence be known while respecting all of it's nooks and crannies.  Take chances, even if it's scary.  Leap but have a parchute.  Trust others but put yourself first.  Ask why but understand that sometimes you will never get an answer.  Find peace with that.  Appreciate every second of every minute of every day because we will never get it back.  Do not take anything or anyone for granted, especially yourself.  Smile. Laugh. Believe.

I love you, B.

Let's Talk Soup

Cold weather makes me crave certain things, namely warm soups and nourishing hearty greens.  Think about how yummy a simple meal of grilled cheese and tomato soup is on a snowy (non-paleo) day, or how a big pot of braised mustard greens or swiss chard with grassfed bacon makes your house smell like heaven.  Oh yeah....bacon truly makes everything better.

The thing I love most about soup is that you can make it with anything. A little of this, a little of that, some veggies that need to be used, some fresh herbs, dried spices, and some stock or broth and BOOM! Soup!  This week, I was feeling a little exotic.  I found out that Harvest Health carries kelp noodles (thanks for the tip, Whit!).  I also had some cilantro I needed to get rid of and a few cans of coconut milk that were begging to be used.  So what did I make? Thai curry soup! 

Remember, as with all of my "recipes" I rarely measure so the amounts are merely guesstimates and I urge you to add ingredients to taste.  Oh, and I urge you to taste.  That's the number one rule of cooking by the way - taste your food as you go and adjust with each step.  You'll be amazed at how much better your meals can taste if you do this one simple little thing.  And if you're wondering what kelp noodles are, get ready to fall in love with your new noodle substitute, paleo peeps!  Kelp noodles are sea vegetables that are filled with good-for-you minerals.  Most importantly, an entire package of kelp noodles has only 18 calories and 3 grams of carbs.....how can you go wrong with that???

Thai Curry Soup with Shrimp 

1 large garlic clove, minced

This is my beloved Le Creuset dutch oven

1 inch piece of fresh ginger, minced     

1 T fresh lemongrass, minced

2-3 T olive oil

2 t fresh curry paste

2 cups of broth (I think veggie would be best but I used what I had so it was a combo of veggie and beef...whatevs)

4 T fish sauce

2 T coconut aminos (or low sodium tamari)

Juice of 1/2 lime

2 T honey

1 T sriracha

1/2 t ground coriander

1 can lite coconut milk

1 package kelp noodles, drained and rinsed

1/2 cup chopped mushrooms (cuz I had some I needed to use)

1 small package organic baby spinach

2 cups thinly sliced cabbage (I had some leftover coleslaw mix so this is what I used - again, I use what I have and need to get rid of)

12 oz. package of frozen peeled, deveined shrimp (tail off)

1/4 cup chopped cilantro

Garnish:

chopped scallions

chopped peanuts

Directions:

Heat oil in large soup pot and add garlic, ginger and lemongrass until fragrant (1-2 minutes). 

Add curry paste and cook 1 minute.

Add broth, fish sauce, coconut aminos (or tamari), lime, honey, sriracha and coriander.  Stir to combine and bring to a boil.  Reduce to a simmer and cook for 20-25 minutes.

Add coconut milk, noodles, mushrooms, spinach, cilantro and cabbage and stir to combine and spinach wilts.

Add shrimp and cover, simmering another 5 minutes or until shrimp cooks.

Taste broth and add more honey, sriracha, coconut aminos...basically anything you want to up whatever flavor you think it needs.

Garnish with chopped scallions and peanuts and enjoy!

*As a note, I had everything for this soup in my fridge and/or cupboards with the exception of the lemongrass.  That's why this soup got the veggies and protein that it did.  If you have different stuff, use different stuff.  It also says something for having a well-stocked kitchen of basics.  My mom taught me that and my mom was a smart lady!

Fitting It All In

Hi.  I'm Michele.  Remember me?  I've been a bad little blogger. I bet Santa won't even come this year. But I hope he does.  Anyway, life has been BUSY! (Yeah so busy you got the capital bold underline!) I keep meaning to sit down and write and then something comes up and it gets pushed off to another day.  Oh well...I suppose that fits in seamlessly with the title of this blog (did you like that transition??).  With the holiday season upon us and our calendars quickly filling up, how do we fit it all in (while remaining sane)?

A few weeks ago, I was out of town for five days for a conference which bumped up into a family obligation.  My usual 4-6 days of Crossfit turned into one day before I had to leave town.  Determined to get my WOD on anyway, I packed up my gym clothes and scoped out the fitness center in the hotel. I sent the info to Sam and he sent me a WOD that I could do on my own.  I was seriously planning on getting it done.  I even intended for it to be the subject of this specific blog - how I fit it in even while away.  But then a really long day of the conference happened, followed by whiskey at the reception.  Whiskey turned into an opportunity to have dinner with other local attorneys and judges at an amazing Italian joint, which turned into a nightcap at the hotel bar.  My plan to get up early to work out before the second day of the conference was trumped by sleeping in in the most comfy hotel bed I have ever slept in, followed by a large coffee and, yes, even a bagel.  Then came lunch and shopping after the conference was done for the day, followed by a triple skinny gingerbread latte from Starbucks (and regardless of the name "skinny" I don't even want to KNOW how many calories were in that thing), topped off with the traditional after-conference dinner with my college friend Bridget at one of our favorite restaurants in downtown Detroit, Roast.  The following week found me backed up with several trials before we broke for the Thanksgiving holiday.  Luckily, I got in one trip to CrossFit GR before I left town AGAIN but that was all I could make happen before I got back to town on Saturday.  Frankly, ladies and gentleman, it has been a busy and somewhat gluttonous few weeks and, regrettably, I have failed to capture any spare moment possible to get my CrossFit on.

So the question becomes, what do you do?  In the past, I'd probably feel bad about it...guilty for not fulfilling some arbitrary obligation that I set for myself and punish myself repeatedly for choosing wine over weights, pasta and porter ice cream (so amazingly delicious by the way) over push-ups.  But the last year of CrossFit has taught me so much more than how to do a snatch (that was for you, Sam....we haven't made a snatch joke in awhile)...it's taught me how to appreciate and celebrate me.  It's taught me that I'm stronger than I ever thought I could be.  I can rise to challenges I never thought I had a chance at completing.  I see now that CrossFit, like life, is a never-ending journey filled with both ups and downs, no reps and PRs, achievements and failures.  Some weeks our sweat hits that mat every single day and some weeks the floor forgets what the imprint of our sweat angel looks like.  More than anything though, CrossFit has taught me that you keep going, no matter what.

So what about me?  Well, I did keep going.  Instead of extending my Thanksgiving holiday away for a few extra days, I came back on Friday afternoon specifically so I could get to CrossFit on Saturday.  Does that seem extreme to some people?  Maybe...but that's how I chose to fit it all in.  Let me tell you, even being gone for just a week from that place made walking in so, so sweet.  As I climbed those stairs and heard that heavy door shut behind me, a sense of calm poured over my soul.  I watched MY people - my friends, my team, my coach - walk in and I couldn't help but smile.  I missed them, even after a few days.  I missed this.  And even though I did NOT miss the eleventy-billion wall balls we had to do (which my legs are still screaming about), I missed encouraging and being encouraged by the people around me.  I missed how amazing it feels to get a PR (longest double under string to date, y'all), and watching a teammate kick ass and NEVER give up (way to go on those 14lb wall balls Bekki!).  This is what CrossFit is about...and it's the one thing you will never lose even when your schedule keeps you away for a little while.

Holidays are a crazy time.  It's filled with family and friends and parties and shopping and wrapping and eating and drinking and traveling and merriment and indulgence all crammed into a six week period of time.  So what do we do?  Do we get down on ourselves or do we find a way to fit it all in whenever and however we can?  In the scheme of things, we have the other 46 weeks in the year to hit it as hard as possible so that we can celebrate and honor that we are doing the best we can during the 6 weeks of the crazy holiday schedule.  Instead of worrying about fitting in CrossFit with our holidays,  maybe we should look at it like fitting holidays in with our CrossFit.  If you think about it, CrossFit is our norm.  It's part of our lives every single day.  The rest is just a brief opportunity to celebrate and know that when it's over, we have a place to go to sweat out that piece of apple pie we allowed ourselves to have.  CrossFit is our everyday.  It's our recovery.  It's our home.

Happy Holidays to all my fellow CrossFitters (and non-CrossFitters) out there.  I'm thankful for being part of this community.

It All Comes Back To Oprah

Let me just start with this. I love Oprah.  Seriously...seriously love me some Op.  I don't know how anyone doesn't. I mean, she's frickin' amazing! If you don't like her, what's wrong with you????  Anyhoo, O (yes we are a nickname basis) always talks about the "Ah ha" moments in life.  You know, those moments where the lightbulb goes off in your head and everything comes together in such a perfect way that you can't help but think, "So THAT's what that was all about? How the fuck did I not see that before???"  Ok, so maybe your moment doesn't include an f-bomb but hey, that's me and I accept it!

Well ladies and gents, I had one last week. An ah-ha moment.  Let me just say, it was incredible, amazing...life-changing if you will.

  Do you know that if you do a Google image search for "Ah ha" moment, Oprah's picture 

           comes up?  Just sayinnnnnnn...

Seriously though...life is full of moments like this.  I am learning that there are lessons everywhere you look.  I think that's the key, though...you have to look and be open to discovering potentially uncomfortable things about yourself in order to grow and change and evolve. I'm a firm advocate that you should never stop striving to be better, never stop giving yourself an opportunity to learn something new.  Even in the most uncomfortable circumstances, you are bound to come out better and brighter than you were before.

It's like with CrossFit.  When you begin, maybe you need to start overhead squatting with a training bar or using a band for your pull-ups.  Maybe you ::cough:: jump a small box.  Whatever it is, it's a step.  With each passing day, each WOD you complete, each moment you walk through the door of your box and you give it everything you have, you open yourself up to getting better.  Soon you trade that training bar for an Oly bar.  Then you start adding plates.  One step at a time you move forward, you learn, you practice your technique, you open yourself to constructive criticism, you have faith in yourself, you take a chance and you get better.   You grow.

It's amazing how many of life's lessons can be reflected back to you in the gym.  Peel away your layers and break down your walls.  It's scary and it can hurt and it leaves you vulnerable but it can also be exciting and make you feel powerful and leave you stronger than you were the day before.  Let your guard down and trust in yourself.  Trust your team, your body, your mind.  Trust other people and let them in.  Human beings are not meant to be islands...I'm learning this as I grow.  We achieve our greatest potential when we have others to lean on for support.  This is true both in AND outside the gym.

So, my ah ha moment?  Yeah...that's not really for you to know in great detail.  It's not the point anyway.  It was MY moment.  Go out and find your own. They're everywhere...you just have to know where to look.

Always Find The Lesson

Last year I painted a chalkboard on one of my walls and filled it with inspirational quotes.  Everyday I walk past that wall countless times but somewhere along the way I stopped really looking at it.  This morning, I looked at it again. . . took my time re-reading the words that I spent an entire day putting up. . . reminded myself why they were up there in the first place.

Life can be hard.  We each have our own battle wounds to tend to, our own scars, our own triumphs.  Some days are easier than others.  Sometimes others let us down.  Sometimes we let ourselves down.  Sometimes it's easier to smile than to frown, and sometimes you just need to give in to whatever emotion is surfacing so that you can move past it.

Life is a journey. As cliche as it is, it's the truth.  And we only have one to live.  Spend each day, week, month, year. . . moment. . .spend it embracing who you are, where you are, what you are.  Accept your faults and your flaws, accept your strengths and your attributes.  Be thankful for the people you've met, as each one is there to teach you a lesson.  When they aren't there any longer, do not mourn the loss but celebrate the gift of knowing them, however long or short it was.  Everyone walks into our lives for a reason and it's up to us to figure out what that is. . .even if it's hard to see in the moment.

Go to the gym.  Don't be afraid to get sweaty.  Lift heavy, yet accept the times when it's necessary to lighten your load.  When your hands bleed, tape them and try again.  Cheer for the first one to finish . . . cheer louder for the last one to finish.  High five your teammates from your respective landing spot on the mat while you regain your breath (and the senses you lost) after a tough WOD.  Be thankful for the body that allows you to do CrossFit. Be respectful of the brain that pushes you to your limits.  Honor those around you who join you in the effort.

Always remember to find the lesson.

Back In The Saddle

Oh lordy it's been awhile since I posted.  If this was my job I would totally fire myself.  I'm sure going several weeks between posts is against some unofficial blog rule but what can you do?

Anyway, the past few weeks have been pretty busy.  I spent a long weekend in NYC and dropped in at  CrossFit Dynamix for a Saturday WOD with Justin.  It was really great to get out and meet other CrossFitters, especially since I got to participate in a team WOD.  It was interesting to take a class in a (much) larger city and see the range of athletes that do CrossFit.  It was definitely great to work out with people who were obviously better than me, and also people that were brand new.  I helped a girl with her handstand during the skill work and it felt good to just point out little tips and tricks from my training that she might have never heard of.

I also found my double-unders in NYC.  Yes, ever since the move to the new box my double-unders have gone to shit. I had not been able to string more than 2 or 3 together at a time and was walking out of the WODS with ridiculous welts on my body and an enormous amount of frustration.  Just when I was reaching my peak of "fuck this I'm never doing double-unders again" I went to New York and dropped in at CrossFit Dynamix.  And they just came back.  After nailing them in NYC I came back to CFGR and was able to pull out some pretty decent strings during a 100 double-under cash out the week after my trip.  I think this trip should be dubbed "How Michele got her double-unders back."  Yep...it's official.

                          It was kinda like this.  Except about CrossFit.  And, you know, me.

So I posted awhile ago about how I wanted to work on monthly goals for the next year in an attempt to get to competition level by next year's GR CrossFit Games.  Sam's been helping me (cuz I made him) and much to my chagrin he decided that October was to be running month.  There was a time in my life where I thought I loved to run.  Looking back, I realized I was completely full of shit.  Picture this....Sicily, 1935.  Just kidding, I had a Golden Girls moment there.  Anyway, picture this...Riverbank 2010.  I decided that since it fell on the anniversary of my mom's passing, I would run it in her honor.  So I started training for the 15.5 mile run and started telling myself I loved it. On May 8, I ran that entire race and pretended that I enjoyed every second of it.  In reality, I don't think I started loving it until about mile 15.35.  Internally, I knew I wasn't really having all that much fun.  Crossing the finish line at Riverbank was one of the greatest accomplishments I've had but after it was over, my running shoes sat in the corner collecting dust much more often than they were strapped onto my feet.  I just couldn't get back into it.  Finding CrossFit opened up a whole new world to me.  I fell in love with the short, high intensity workouts CrossFit is known for.  I love slinging weights and getting dirty and sweating it out with a small, intense group of people.  But alas....we run in CrossFit. And I tend to hate it.  And Sam knows it.  I'm pretty much convinced this is why he started off these monthly goals with running.  He's kinda a sadistic son of a bitch sometimes (you know you are, Sam) and I'm pretty sure he loves making me do things he knows that I hate.  So, for October, I've added extra running/rowing workouts into my week on top of my regular CrossFit WODs.  At the end of the month, the goal is to have stripped some time off my mile.  I'll let you know how it goes.  Can't wait to see what Sam comes up with for next month.

                                            Hahahahahaha!  I crack myself up....

So even though I admit this wasn't a very great post after so long, I'm gonna end it here because it's Sunday and I'm busy lazing around with my pup mourning the poor performances of both the Tigers and the Wolverines.  OMG how bad was THAT?  Ugh.  Anyway, on November 10 we're having an Open House/Charity WOD at the new box.  It's gonna be really great and a chance for everyone to check out the new space.  To get more information on the event and to RSVP, mosey on over to our Facebook.  Hope to see you there!

Our Destiny

Sometime we forget that WE are in control of our own destiny.  No one has the ability to make us feel inferior unless we allow them to.  We choose how we live, love and treat others.  We decide whether to work to our potential or let life (and opportunity) pass us by.  Who we are is not about how much money we make, who our friends are, what we look like or what our social status is.  Who we are is who we CHOOSE to be every single day.  When we have a positive attitude, when we put more weight on the bar, when we treat others with respect, when we hit a PR, when we push ourselves to do one more pull up despite our screaming hands, when we accept ourselves in every single moment despite our flaws, when we encourage our box-mates - that is when we are the truest reflection of our best selves.

No one, especially me, is perfect.  We all have our "things" - our faults, our flaws, our weaknesses, our walls.  Our reasons to want to run and hide instead of exposing ourselves and taking chances.  Life is about learning that it is in the most uncomfortable moments of exposure and risk that the best things happen to us.  Without risk there would be no reward.  Without acceptance there would be no love.

Without CrossFit there would be no outlet, no community, no home like the one we've made inside our box.

Go to your box.  Lift heavy and lighten your emotional burden.  Appreciate your callouses as well as your team.  Get sweaty. Accept your performance and always strive to be better.  Take it in and remember that this is one place where no one will ever judge you.

Chocolate With A Side Of Muscles

Ladies and gentleman, I have a problem.  A chocolate problem.  I don't know what is happening but lately I am OBSESSED with chocolate.  Legit obsessed. Is this what happens to the fairer sex when we get into our thirties?  Thankfully, I've found some decent ways of taming the addict inside - namely in the form of paleo chocolate chips and dark chocolate covered almonds.  Listen....I'm not saying they're carrots people, but I'm doing my best.  I'm quite happy that Horrock's is a decent drive from my house or else they'd be out of those damn almonds on a daily basis.

'Nough said

Yesterday, a team of girls from CFGR competed in the GR CrossFit Games.  It was pretty awesome.  Teams from across the midwest (many who were ranked at Regional level in the Games) competed in a full-day competition consisting of events called Dirty Triathlon, Heavy Burden, Power Carnival, Skill Ladder and a championship event called Hellfire.  It was inspiring to watch some of the amazing CrossFitters from our region battle it out.  I would love to compete in this event next year but know I have a ton of work ahead of me to get to that level.  Maybe this was what I needed to light the fire under my ass after my mopey post last week.  I'm honestly thinking of putting together a 12-month plan to work towards that competition goal.  I'm thinking one goal for each month.  I have no idea how to put it together (maybe my coach can help????) but I'll keep you posted.  Either way - super inspired.

Speaking of yesterday, I not only got to watch some kick-ass athletes in action, but also had the privilege of listening to a few men discuss their opinion of the CrossFit woman's body.  Many ladies who do CrossFit are seriously built.  They have ripped arms, strong shoulders, backs that look like road maps......they're tough as fuck.  Personally, I think it's sexy as hell but realize that not all guys would be into that. 

She doesn't do CrossFit

She's a CrossFit champ.

Can you see the difference there?  I'm not saying that one is better than the other, but for me I'd rather be able to do overhead squats, flip tractor tires and kill a muscle-up than wear a pink tutu.  Ok, who am I kidding - I'd rock the tutu....but I'd do it while deadlifting 250 pounds.  According to the guys I was listening to, their appreciation of the sport of CrossFit and the level of strength and skill needed to look and compete like Julie Foucher has changed their minds about girls with muscles.  It takes a special guy to appreciate a tough girl and a special girl to be proud to be that tough.  I'm curious - what do you think?

My last shout-out on this post goes to my family at CFGR.  After posting my last blog entry, I was overwhelmed by the amount of support, love and encouragement I got from my team and my coach. We all have our low moments, our dark spots, our days where we just want to give up.  I'm still working my way out of that but it's been better.  I had a snatch PR, an Annie PR, and a slight breakthrough on my squat in the past few weeks.  I'm feeling encouraged and motivated after this weekend's competition and I'm excited about the move to the new gym and all the great changes on the horizon for CFGR.  As with everything, I think it's just something I gotta take one day at a time.

So, to wrap it up, for tonight's dinner I'm trying out some gyro burgers I picked up a few months ago from the co-op care of S & S Lamb.  I'm topping the burgers with tzatiki sauce (my dairy exceptions to paleo), cucumber, tomato and red onion and I'm trying out some paleo burger buns from Against All Grain.   Couple that with tonight's season premiere of Dexter, and it makes for a pretty great Sunday night.

Oh......and I'll probably murder some chocolate chips.  Hey...at least I'm honest!

And So It Goes.....

Pre-read warning:  This post takes a completely different tone than entries thus far.  If you're looking for a snappy fun read, I'd just go ahead and skip this altogether.

For much of my adult life, I've had inferiority issues.  Some may call it self-esteem or label it as confidence (or lack thereof).  Call it whatever you want, but I've always felt like less.  It was in my twenties when I really started noticing all of the things that I was not, as opposed to all that I was.  I began the process of focusing on the "what if's" in life, and let me tell you, those thoughts extended to every facet of my existence - more than you could possibly begin to think of.

What if I tried a little harder in college - could I have received a scholarship to law school?

What if I dreamed a little bigger - could I be doing something that made me happier?

What if I was more financially responsible - would I still have the mortgage in student loans that I'm trying to dig my way out of?

What if I was girlier/prettier/less crass/more sophisticated - would I be married and chasing babies around my house by now?

What if I would have pushed myself harder in law school - would I have been able to get a better job right away instead of having to spend six years in an office where I was literally abused and harassed by my boss almost daily?

What if, what if, what if?

When I discovered CrossFit, I started feeling a little better about myself.  There weren't many people I knew who did it, and I was proud to say that I pushed my limits in a way that most people wouldn't even consider. It made me feel just a little bit special.

Lately, that "special-ness" has been dwindling.  While I watch others around me progress, I feel like I'm doing the exact opposite.  On a daily basis, I feel almost like I'm moving backward.  I've written about the squat issues and how it's testing the limits of my ego but it doesn't quite measure up to exactly what it touches inside me.  Feeling like I'm moving in reverse at the gym absolutely triggers some of my deepest insecurities that no one can ever really understand.  When I withdraw into myself at the gym, Sam looks at me like I'm a drama queen.  When my friends essentially tell me to suck it up and have fun, they don't understand. But how could they, really?  To them, it's a workout and not a measure of your worth.  To me, however, it's one of the few things that I try to grasp onto to make me feel special.  I'm always striving for that, always reaching for that thing that will validate me to....well, to myself.

I watch videos of women who do CrossFit, I get intrigued by the women's heats at the Games, and I watch our super stars at the gym train for our local competition.  While I'm so proud and so supportive, I'm internally struggling with the fact that I'm not that good.  I can't perform at that level.  I can't compare.  Though I was one of the first ladies to step through the door, I sometimes feel like one of the weakest.  I'm moving backward.  I'm lifting lighter.  I don't have a place.

Now before I get comments telling me I'm ridiculous, understand that whether or not your reality is different than mine, this is how I feel.  Lately, I feel CrossFit lost.  That barbell that once made me feel powerful is making me feel frustrated.  In a place where I was once feeling saved, even safe, in the exposure of my weaknesses, I now feel so unworthy.  The worst part is that it's all my own doing.

If you know me at all, through life, through the gym or merely through the words on this blog, you've likely encountered a loud, slightly crass girl with a quick tongue and a habit for playful banter.  What you probably don't know is that the jokes I make is the armor I wear to hide the fact that I'm constantly feeling inferior to every one of my powerful team members.  It's the mask I place to cover up that I know I should be better - a better example of what a year of CrossFit can do.  I should be a CFGR leader and not the den mother who packs lunches for the real athletes.  I should be more.  I should do more.  And I'm struggling with figuring out how to do that on my own.

And I guess that's just it - I'm struggling, friends.  As much as I know that everyone has these moments, I can't seem to figure out how to brush mine off and move forward.  Next month, I'm taking a long weekend to visit some friends in New York.  I anticipate I'll do a drop in class at CrossFit Dynamix in Astoria.  Just as Kurt introduced me to CrossFit, I passed my love of the sport to Justin.  Now Justin joined up with his crew in Queens and had the delusional idea to tell them I was some sort of, and I quote, CrossFit "beast" just because I (again quote) "kicked his ass" during the class I took him to.  What he didn't understand was that the only reason for that was because he'd never done it before - of course I'd be able to handle it a little better.  Now his box-mates are apparently looking forward to meeting me and I'm trying to figure out a way to get around it.  I have a hard enough time showing weakness in front of my CFGR family - I'm not sure how I'll be able to handle it with a box full of strangers.

I know this type of thinking happens when you invest in something as physically and emotionally intense as CrossFit.  Day after day, we push our minds, hearts and bodies to the limit.  We break ourselves down to build ourselves up.  We fall further so we can stand taller.  And while this may be the moment where I sit in my valley before I triumphantly climb my mountain, I'm admitting that, currently, the mountain seems insurmountable.  I can only hope (and try to believe) that just as in the past, that concrete box within that dirty steel factory will once again help me find my wings.

Until then.......

Humility Stinks

This squat thing is really getting to me.  I'm frustrated that I suck at it and I'm frustrated that Sam knows I suck at it. I'm frustrated when Sam only allows me to back squat 95 pounds during strength sets and 65 pounds during a WOD. I'm frustrated because my ego is making me frustrated.  So what's the lesson?  CrossFit is about being your best, not about comparing yourself to anyone else (including your old improperly squatting self).  I know that I need to suck it up and keep at it or else I'm gonna end up walking with a cane in my older years.  I also know that by working on it now, I'm building the foundation for (hopefully) superior performance in the future.  This is just a really difficult life lesson for me at the moment and I'm admittedly struggling with it every day.  If anyone has any advice on how to handle this with better humility, I'm all for it.  Please bestow your wisdom.

                            Please God, if this is me let me at least dress better than this....

Some exciting things are happening at CFGR.  By the way, at this point in blog reading, I know you are all totes wanting to start CrossFit.  Have you checked out our website?  Some amazingly creative person made it.  I have no idea who she could be.....except it was me.  Yeah.  Check it out.  Anyway, back to the exciting things.  When I was in college, my friend Jack started calling me bulljiver because I used to say that I had news but then wouldn't tell him.  I didn't like that nickname and didn't understand why he gave it to me.  Except now I do because those exciting things I mentioned?  I can't tell you yet. Just know they are sweet.  If you want to know the truth, I really want to tell you but Sam doesn't want to yet.  He's being conservative with the news and he's the boss so I guess I have to listen to him.  Just know it's pretty awesome and will make you all very jealous excited.

Since I can't yet share the big news, I will tell you about some new equipment that we have.  First up is the prowler.  I haven't had the pleasure of working with it yet, but I hear it's super fun. Well, that's what people would say on opposite day.  Yeah.....it's a bitch that prowler. Rawr!

                                     He's being a bit of a P with these light weights....sheesh

Sam also got himself some big cement balls.  He likes them.  They make him happy.  They look like this.

We haven't used them yet.  I think they are a lawsuit waiting to happen (what?? It's the lawyer in me) but Sam likes to remind us that we signed waivers.  So I guess it's legit.  I have no idea what we're gonna do with them but they just sit at the gym and remind us that if we step out of line, they can be incorporated into a WOD to put us all in the hurt box.

I feel like I have a lot more to say but I truly have that feeling inside that it's going to be an emotional and personal post and I'm just not ready to get into that quite yet.  So I'll end this one by saying that I made the paleo chocolate sweet potato brownies from PaleOMG.  They are non-dairy and contain no refined sugar.  They're pretty healthy actually.  For realz.  They tasted good...like real good.  I think, however, that they could be considered more of a sweet bread than a brownie. It's the cinnamon. Either way....put them in your mouth.  Well, bake them first and then put them in your mouth.

You're Such A Tool...And Other Random Things

So do you know how awesome it is to go to a Michigan football game in the fall?  If you don't, you need to get out more...or switch teams...or both.  Switch football teams I mean.  The other stuff is your own biz.  But anyway, Saturday I went to the Ann Arbor for the football game.  We stopped for lunch at my fav deli ever, Zingerman's.  I ate an amazing sandwich that contained both grains and dairy. So not paleo.  Who has two thumbs and doesn't give a fuck? This chick.  Zingerman's is that good.

Do you know that Juli over at PaleOMG makes amazeballs paleo blueberry muffins?  I made them Sunday to repent for my non-paleo sins of the weekend and let me tell you.  They. Are. Clutch.  So so good. Eat them now.

Ummm, what else? Sam is re-tooling my squat.  I guess the title of this blog should have been "I'm such a tool" but oh well.  I would rather call you out then myself.   Apparently, my squat sucks.  Which now has created problems with my back.  In that, it hurts like a mother all the freakin' time.  So now it's back to square one.  Like legit square one.  Do you know that when your squat sucks you get to go off in a corner and get cozy with a PVC pipe to work on your form?  It's pretty hot.  That's a lie. It's embarrassing and annoying but I'm trying to suck it up because I know it's necessary.  Let me tell you, it's taking a lot of pride swallowing.  Sam won't let me load the bar...like with anything. I'm seriously squatting at a minimum 50 pounds less than what I'm used to.   He also has this new app he just LOVES to torture us with.  Basically, he takes videos of us and then he can play them back in slow-mo frame by frame while drawing lines and angles through us to show us how much we suck at what we're doing.  Or maybe that's just me.  Anyway, it's super fun to watch a video of yourself in this fashion.  That was a joke by the way.  Video cameras should not be allowed in a gym. Stupid smart phones...nobody is safe.  So I'll probably keep an update on how my squat progresses cuz I know that you are all so interested in keeping abreast of the situation.

I made some delish jambalaya tonight for dinner and instead of rice I used cauliflower.  I swear to you that it could have been rice - you would have never known the difference if I didn't tell you.  Do you people want recipes for stuff like this?  Or do you just want me to talk about how yummy it was and make you jealz?

By the way, there's a nifty little stats page on my blog that I found today. It tells you how many views your blog gets and where your viewers are and such. Do you know that my blog has been viewed by someone(s) in Russia and Germany and Vietnam and lots of other crazy countries??? BOOM!!!  Now it just needs to make it's way to Cookville, TN so Rich can read it and fall in love with me.  I can see it now.....

Sometimes posts in this blog will just have to end with pictures of Rich.  Shirtless.  And wet.  With his dog.  Because that's just hot.

Ladies and Gentleman....Whitney!

This hot, dirty girl above is one of my CrossFit besties, Whitney.  She's pretty amaze and she agreed to be my first guest blogger!  Whit joined CFGR in January of this year and I instantly realized I found a soul mate.  She's kind and witty, determined and sassy.  She started an amazing group called Social Charity Club of Grand Rapids (Fact:  You need to check it out - you'll even see pictures of her in regular clothes!).  She's basically my sister from anotha mista and she's here to post a days worth of delish paleo recipes in honor of CFGR Paleo Month!!!!  Take it away, Whit!

When I walked into the gym last week and saw my name signed up under September’s challenge: “Paleo Diet- No Dairy, Grains or Legumes” I was equally nervous and excited. Nervous because I love carbs and wine and have never gone more than a week without either. However, my inner blogging nerd was really excited to start the hunt for new Paleo food blogs.  I decided not to erase my name off the board (thanks Sam) and give this primal thing a shot!

Breakfast: Eggs, avocados and tomatoes

 source: leanitup.com

2 eggs

Handful spinach

Chopped onion and peppers

Garlic pepper

Coconut oil

Avacado

Tomato

Directions: sauté onions and peppers in coconut oil, add eggs and scramble. Add spinach and mix until wilted.  Pepper to taste. Slice half of an avocado and tomato and enjoy!

Lunch:  Chicken Avocado Soup

source:  Skinny Taste

Dinner: Maple Roasted Chicken and Sweet Potatoes

I added Brussels sprouts when I make this dish for more green veggies!

Source:  Rubies and Radishes

*Michele note:  Holy frick this looks delish.  Rubies and Radishes is a blog Whit turned me onto and has now been added to my collection of go-to food blogs when I need inspiration or just want to look at pretty pictures of yummy things!

                 

In addition to my main dishes I am eating spinach salad, a LOT of spinach salad.  I am actually thinking of buying stock in Earthbound Farms.  To reward myself for giving up such delicacies as Kashi Go Lean Crunch and red quinoa I found this tasty treat: Dark Chocolate Almond Butter Cups from the Tasty Yummies website.  Seeing as how I am a women and chocolate is indeed necessary for survival, this recipe will be memorized by the end of this challenge!  Bon Appetit my primal friends!  

Dark Chocolate Almond Butter Cups from Tasty Yummies

A-Paleo-Way We Go!

I just found out that we're having another Paleo Challenge at the gym in September.  As you can tell from the title of this blog, I kinda suck at committing to the paleo lifestyle (even though I should).  For those of you who are unaware, eating paleo means essentially eating as our ancestors once did.  It is also sometimes coined the Primal Diet, or even the Caveman Diet.

The CrossFit community is super into paleo eating. If you think about it, it sorta goes hand in hand.  CrossFit is a rather caveman-ish way of working out.  Me strong person. Me lift heavy weight. Me climb ropes (trees) and swing sledge-hammers (uhhhh......club?).  Me throw heavy ball into the air......no wait, that doesn't work. Where the frick do wall balls come from anyway?? Frickin' stupid wall balls.  Anyhoo, CrossFit+Paleo = Hot Marriage of Sexiness.

To be very basic, paleo eating is about insulin control.  Essentially, it means cutting all grains, dairy and legumes from your diet and focusing on lean proteins and veggies with some fruits, nuts and seeds thrown in for variety.  It also means eating clean by cutting out sugars and bad fats, limiting your pesticide/hormone intake by eating organic and grass fed food, and consuming healthy oils.  When I first heard of this, I made the argument (me??? argue????) that I'm sure our ancestors used to eat things like rice, right?  Or maybe those were just asian cavemen, I don't know.

Calm down, it was a joke.

I'm not a doctor and don't really feel like getting into the bio-chemistry of it all so Google it if you want more medical deets.  Or check out Robb Wolf - he's kinda the king shit on all things paleo.

                            Who needs medical confirmation when you have a flow chart??
         

But seriously, if you think of it in terms of insulin, it makes sense.  Foods higher on the glycemic index, like carbohydrates and starchy veggies, spike our blood sugars and promote the release of insulin.  When this happens, your body converts from using your fat as an energy source to using the insulin instead.  It slows everything down.  That kinda sucks.

Now I'm sure many of you are criticizing me, thinking that i'm an idiot and that this diet isn't balanced and you need whole grains and dairy and blah blah blah.  I don't necessarily disagree.  However, I believe that our eating habits and lifestyle have to be personalized to what works for us.  A few years ago, I really altered my diet to the point where I was eating mainly vegetarian (slightly vegan) with some animal protein and dairy thrown in occasionally.  I got my main source of protein from soy (until I learned about the connection between soy and estrogen intake), beans and those fake meat things in the frozen section of the grocery store.  It worked fine for me until I started doing CrossFit.  After that, my body needed more. It couldn't survive a tough WOD on that type of diet. I wanted MEAT. I craved it.

                                          That's not me (obvi) but you get the idea

Once I increased my animal protein intake, I noticed that my performance got better.  That's what works for ME.  In an effort to increase the health benefits (and reduce the unhealthy risks), I purchase all of my protein from local farms.  It's all free-range, grass fed, hormone free goodness.  It's better for me and the environment.  It might not work for you and that's ok, but stop bitching about what everyone else eats and just focus on yourself.

So back to the challenge.  In January, we had a paleo challenge that introduced me to the lifestyle for the first time.  Because of my ridiculously competitive nature, I was fairly strict with myself and won the challenge.  I got a foam roller as a reward - that fucker is a torture device that knows no limits on the amount of pain that it can induce.  True story.  After winning, I slowly started getting lazy and eventually completely forgot I really, really liked how I felt and performed while eating paleo.

This time around, since I already got my, uh, prize, I want to focus on tweaking the diet to best suit me.  I'll be honest - I will not give up cream in my coffee this time.  It's just the way it is.  I have reduced my coffee consumption to one, mayyyyybe two cups of day and I like it with cream.  I sometimes go to sleep at night excited to get up and have a cup of coffee in the morning.  I will not be giving up that joy.  (It's the little things, people).  Also, there are many paleo eaters out there that consume "healthy" sugar in the form of organic honey, pure maple syrup, etc.  I will likely do this sometimes too.  There's a 21-day sugar detox I've noticed many of my favorite bloggers have participated in that I might try in the future, but that's for another time.  Other than those few exceptions, I am going to attempt to be as strict paleo as possible for the next month.

I'll try to post some recipes of things I eat and updates on how I feel.  Who knows, at the end of this month, maybe this Not Quite Paleo Princess may become just a Princess after all!

5 Reasons We Probably Suck

First of all, I'd like to take a second before I get to the heart of this post to let you know how much I appreciate all of you.  The loss of my uncle was a blow to my family and words cannot express how much all of your kind words, thoughts, texts, phone calls and messages meant to me in the past week.  I couldn't ask to be surrounded by better people.  

Now.....onto it.

I was recently reading a blog I have grown to love and found a post written by a coach who talked about all of the things people do in his gym that piss him off.  It was pretty humorous and got me thinking....what do we do on a daily basis that probably drives Sam to drink?  There were some items in the list I was reading that I know I've done and I thought I'd take a moment to include them here.  Sam, let me know if I'm close....

Top 5 Reasons We Probably Suck

1. Asking how to perform an exercise before Sam has a chance to even explain the WOD.  Ummm...yeah I've done that.  Not often but I know I have and you know you have to.  Has Sam ever let us just go off and start a WOD without instruction on what to do? No...so we should probably quit asking.

2.  Interrupting another class.  Now I know that I have come into the gym for the 6pm class and observed the 5:00 warriors working through their WOD.  I try to do my best to not get in the way or do anything to interrupt but who knows...maybe I have.  I can imagine that it would be super annoying to Sam if someone came in and got in the way of the earlier class so that they could stretch or work on a skill or talk.  I know we're a community but for fucks sake......wait your turn.  The blog also talked about athletes who walked in during a class and asked their coach questions about the WOD.  I can't imagine anyone doing that and if you have....don't do it again! I think the penalty for this crime should be a C-punch. 

3.  Getting in the way.  This kinda goes with number two but I know I have been in the middle of a WOD and had people come in for the next class and start working on stuff right in my way. This has generally happened when I'm working out in the other room but it's happened (not naming names).  However, to be fair I also know that I've been an offender of the post-WOD stretch during the next class' warmup.  I don't know why I don't move to the other room.  The only thing that I can come up with is that I am so destroyed from the WOD that I forget where I am and temporarily lose my mind.  You'd think the stampeding sound of people running and squatting around me would bring me back to reality but sometimes I'm just an idiot.  I'm sorry Sam.  **Hangs my head in shame.**

4. Bumper plates. We love bumper plates.  I love them because I think I'm a badass when I can drop my heavy bar on the ground after a tough set.  The fact is, however, that we have a limited number of bumpers and we don't need to use them for everything.  I know.....it's crazy but true.  There is no strategic advantage to using bumpers.  We can't lift more weight with bumpers.  As much as I would like to believe it, there is no magic bumper fairy that helps us lift the bar.  I bet if they made a 2.5lb bumper plate, we'd think it was necessary to use it.  There are certain lifts that we absolutely need to use bumpers.  Cleans, snatches, jerks and push presses are where bumpers are necessary.  Deadlifts, squats and bench presses....not so much.  I sometimes forget that there are lots and lots of metal plates next door just itching to be strapped onto our bar.  And, when we deadlift with the metal I think we kinda look more badass because it makes loud noises.  Yup - I like loud noises.  So let's not freak out if we run out of 25 or 45 lb bumpers.  We need to use our noggins and grab the metal or else Sam may go postal on us.

5.  Freaking out over limited equipment.  I KNOW for a fact that many of us do this.  Because of the current size of our box, we don't have a ton of equipment.  When our WOD calls for ring work, I have heard people panic over the fact that we don't have enough to go around.  CrossFit is all about working with what you have and being inventive.  So there's 8 of us and 3 sets of rings?  Oh shit, I guess 5 of us will just have to go home since we don't have enough rings to go around.  Fuck you...see you later!  Uhhhh...no people.  Just think outside the box. We can stagger, start at different areas, or go in heats.  Why is this so hard for such badasses like us?  Do we panic so much over how much pain Sam is going to put us through that such elementary concepts leave our brain?  I think that must be the only explanation.

Don't get offended if you've done any of these things. As I've mentioned, I've done them too. I just wonder what Sam would think of this...yes Sam, I expect a response to this blog.  I heard Sam mention that he ran into one of the owners at 8th Day a few weeks ago and he mentioned that he had taught his first class in months.  Then I thought of our coach....Sam coaches us a minimum of 15 classes a week and that doesn't even include his other clients at his other gyms.  He gives a lot of his time to us and I think the least we can do is stop committing these horrible crimes of stupidity.  Remember - he alone holds the power to program WODs like Murph or, worse yet, workouts including wall balls and seated box jumps.  Let's not piss him off........I may not know from personal experience but I would guess that walls balls are worse than a C-punch any day.

Stop Being A Whiney Bitch

Saturday I went to CFGR for our bi-weekly group WOD.  These are generally pretty fun.  We team up (duh, "group" WOD) and tackle a workout which usually has us breaking a sweat but allows for some good ol' fashion teamwork mixed with a slight helping of competition.  I love Saturday WODS because, to me, it's generally an easier workout than we get during the week, focusing on basics like pushups and situps.  Sometimes, it's even followed by group breakfast.....except, well, lately.  Anyway, this Saturday's WOD was as follows:

100-80-60-40-20

Wall balls
Box jumps
Kettle Bell Swings

Now that's a fuckload of reps but when nine people showed up and I started mentally dividing us into groups of 3 and it didn't seem so bad.  Let's do this!

Except......Sam told us we weren't doing it in groups of 3.  Nope....we paired off.  Like, in two.  Now you may look at that workout and think it doesn't sound so bad in pairs.  Well fuck off....it was.  YOU try doing doing 300 reps of walls balls, box jumps, and kettle bell swings in groups of 2 without a break and then tell me how you feel.

Ok, so at this point you're likely wondering why I titled this blog "Stop Being A Whiney Bitch."  It's because I admit that sometimes I can be a whiney bitch.  I have a horrible little habit of telling Sam "I can't."  I can't do double unders.  I can't do ring dips. I can't I can't I can't.  The number one culprit?? Box jumps.

                                    I hate this unassuming motherfucking piece of wood

Ladies and gentleman...meet my nemesis.  Box jumps require the most basic of skill.  You stand. You jump. You land.  Lather, rinse, repeat.  Except.......no.  It doesn't work like that for me.  I stand.  I look. I step backward. I look again. I tilt my head to the side as if the box is composed of some formula requiring the use of quantum physics and fucking unicorn dust to solve.  I step up again. I take a deep breath. I attempt to jump. I stop midway through. I hit the wall. I swear because my hand hurts.  I kick the box. I swear because my foot hurts. I try again.  I have another brain block. I look at Sam. He looks at me.  I attempt to walk out of the gym. He points to the pussy box.  I jump on it and get pissed that I have to modify such a stupid simple exercise.  And, voila, I become a whiney bitch.

For one year, I have whined because of that hunk of wood.  I can jump it, then I can't jump it.  I can jump it during warmup, then I can't during the WOD.  It's more frustrating than not being able to do a muscle up (what??? Muscle up??? Yeah I'll focus on those in like...three years).  It's frustrating because I know that I don't lack the technical ability or strength to do it.  It's all mental.  It's mind over matter, brain over body.  It's turning off your head and just doing it.  And I struggle. And I whine.  And that's just not an attractive trait. But I do it anyway. See what box jumps do to me???

As some of you may know, I'm stubborn as a mule.  I am harder on myself than any one of you could ever be.  I hate looking stupid or weak or unable to do something.  This is my biggest struggle with CrossFit.  I can't get over my inability to just accept my shortcomings. I want to be good at everything. I want to do the WOD the fastest, lift the most weight,  finish first.  When that doesn't happen, I get pissed and think that everyone is looking at me or judging me.  Sad fact - I need to get over myself because no one gives a fuck what I'm doing.  They are too busy worrying about what THEY are doing.  

Wait, what? I'm not????

So back to Saturday.  Box jumps.  Michele v. The Big Girl Box.  I started the WOD. I jumped. I landed. I jumped again. I landed.  I turned off my brain. I landed.  Rep after rep after rep. I jumped, I landed.  Once, during the 40 round, I missed.  I took a step back.  I looked at Amanda. I closed my eyes and I jumped again.  And I landed.  By the end of the WOD I did nearly 150 box jumps without once modifying or whining or saying "I can't."  I just did.  And I learned that every time you're a whiney bitch, you will inevitably have to eat your words because you will.  And then you just look like an ass.   This has happened with almost every exercise that I have told Sam I would never be able to do.  And I really hate when Sam is right.

So I'm going to stop being a whiney bitch because as long as I keep coming to class, I know that the things that I struggle with will always become easier.  And then Sam will be right and I will be wrong and frankly, that just should never happen, like, ever.

What's So Great About YOUR Box, Huh?

I've been thinking a lot about what makes someone choose a box.  Yes, a CrossFit gym is called a box and yes, you are a douche for thinking otherwise (and yes, I'm referring to the same douche who couldn't handle the conversation about the snatch in my previous post).  Anyhoo....so why does someone choose a particular box and what makes them stay?

A little research on the history of CrossFit will tell you that before we had commercials and Reebok sponsorships and nationally televised games, CrossFit was like the underground after-hours club of fitness.  It was done in garages and warehouses and basements.  Now, with CrossFit exploding from something like 500 boxes a few years ago to 4,000 boxes today (I guarantee you're chuckling right now, Sam.......grow up) people have more of a choice on where they want to work out and I can't help but wonder what makes someone choose one over another.

When I decided I wanted to start CrossFit, I did a quick Google search and CFGR was the first box I found.  I emailed them that evening, set up my beginners class, and never looked back.  Bing, bang, boom. Done and done. I don't fuck around.  Though CFGR was actually the first CrossFit affiliate in GR, it went into a small hiatus for a few years and had a grand re-opening last October. I started a week or so after it opened and back then, there were days when I was the only one in class. For awhile, I was the only girl and then slowly, one by one, people started showing up. Some came and went, and some have stuck around. Some come once or twice a week and some are there nearly everyday. Some I rarely see unless I sneak out of work for  a lunch class and some I will likely never see because I avoid the 6am classes if at all possible.

I'll admit - CFGR isn't the prettiest box. Ha....even I had to laugh at that one.  Anyway, it's not.  It's literally in a steel factory.  When we needed more room, we broke into a wall and expanded into the next door room which, no joke, has wood panels.  70's porn anyone????....bow chicka bow wow.  There are no showers and we share bathrooms with the factory workers.  They're scary.  Sometimes we have to modify our wods so that people start at different points if we have a big class and not enough equipment to go around.  As Whitney likes to say, some of our weights were dropped off from the factory and look like they were survivors of the Titanic.  We have one rower. We make our own wall balls and sleds.  So why do I still go here, you ask? Because why would I not?

CrossFit is not about cute colored kettle bells and fancy equipment.  Would that be nice? Hell yeah! I like pretty stuff.  I sometimes wish we had a little bit more but I never focus on that for long.  In the 10 months I have been at the gym, we are constantly bringing in new equipment.  We have new bumper plates, new pull up bars, new jump ropes .....and it keeps coming.  I'm sure eventually we may even have to move as we're slowly outgrowing our space but whether that happens in a week, a month, or a year makes no difference to me. We may never get another rower (actually, I hope we don't....Sam take that off the list) but I will never, EVER change boxes unless I absolutely have to.  You know why? My coach is at CFGR. My friends and team are at CFGR.   Those are my people and that is my home.  They know what I excel at and what I struggle with. They know how to push me when I don't feel like pushing myself. They know when to tell me to suck it up and put more weight on the bar and they know when to back off and help me add some bumpers to my little girl box when my legs just don't want to jump that day.  

                                                        She'd school me

I did my very first double under during a team wod with Skuke.  Actually, I did my first handstand with Skuke too.  Maybe he's good luck.  Whit knows how much it means when I nail my box jumps.  Sam can tell me exactly how much weight I can handle on my lifts, even when I don't want to believe him.  Lisa E. makes me laugh every single day and Lisa T. works with me in making sure Lisa E. works to her potential when she's being lazy.  Marc is convinced I can climb the rope and I love watching Katie say she can't do something two seconds before she does it flawlessly.  I will always expect Steve to make fun of himself for his "dip-ups", Angie to get excited about how strong her forearms are and Dan to be super encouraging, even when he's struggling. Marcia just impresses the hell out of me all the way around and I can't wait until JJ hits her first muscle-up. I stay because Amanda is the most energetic person during every single wod that she makes you remember that it's supposed to be fun.  I could go on and on and on about these people and everyone else that I have the pleasure of pushing my limits with every single day but this blog would never end.  

What's so great about my box?  The people inside it.   And they're worth more than any pink kettlebell or fancy locker room or cool-kid reputation.  I'd put my box up against yours any day, just as I'm sure you'd do for your own (ok, I had to get one more in there before I ended this post).  That's the beauty of this sport and I wouldn't change it for anything.

Now, I said I'd post recipes sometimes and since my dinner was super delicious tonight I thought I'd share. 

Chicken and Veggie "Pasta" with Fresh Pesto

Spaghetti Squash - Did you know you can cook this in a crockpot?  Pierce it a few times so it doesn't explode and throw it in with a few cups of water and let it go low all day or night and boom! 

Broccoli - Organic and local from the farmers market

Garlic - Organic and local from the farmers market

Shallots

Tomatoes - from Amanda's garden

Pesto - Homemade with fresh organic basil from, you got it, the farmer's market

Chicken from Creswick Farms - purchased at the co-op

Pesto is so easy to make.  Some basil, olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper and you have the base for a pesto.  It also calls for pine nuts but because I always have raw blanched almonds in my freezer, more times than not I add these. Plus they give a nice crunch.  Some people also add cheese to their pesto (parmesan for example) but I don't think it's necessary so I don't. Plus we're going for #paleo baby!  

Anyway, I threw the veggies in a pan with some good Italian olive oil (is there any other kind??) and the smallest smidge of butter.  It looked like this  -------------------->

While that was going, I sauteed some chicken breast that I pounded thin and cut into pieces (salt and pepper always people.....on everything).  When it was all done, I threw everything into the pan, mixed the pesto into the squash, topped it with the chicken and veggies and sent Whitney a text about how jealous she should be about my delicious dinner.

And THAT, my friends, is what can come out of a simple trip to the farmers market!  Until next time...........